March 12, 2019

Never Say Never: Things I Said I'd Never Do as a Parent and Why It's Ok to Change Your Mind



Last week, as I was putting on one of Morley’s (many) Princess Elsa shirts, I found myself reflecting on a time when I said I would never watch Disney’s Frozen. 

Fast forward 4 or 5 years, and Frozen now consumes my life - some days, it looks (and sounds) like Frozen threw up in our living room. And 4 or 5 years later, I’m ok with that. Most days, I’m singing and dancing right along. 

At the end of the day, it’s what make my daughter happy and putting (and keeping) a smile on her face is my #1 goal. 

Things I Said I'd Never Do as a Parent

Before having kids, I had a handful of things I said I’d never do as parent - let them watch Frozen, be able to handle puke, be bound by routine, or let them roll around on the floor in the middle of the grocery store, to name a few.

But as I've learned over the past 3 years, things change. Never say never.

As a parent, some days it’s full on survival mode. At the expense of your sanity, you do what you have to to get by. Even if that means changing your mind and giving into those things you said you would NEVER EVER do. 

We all have ideas about how we are going to parent our kids. But the truth is, there is no rule book. You have no way to predict what your future children will be like. It’s on the job training, and you learn as you go. And sometimes, that means abandoning your prior beliefs and going with what works for YOU.

Things I Said I'd Never Do as a Parent

Are there things you said you would NEVER do as a parent? But now that you are a parent, you’ve thrown those things right out the window?

Maybe it’s screen time. Maybe it’s giving into your two year old. Maybe it’s feeding them Kraft Dinner. Or maybe, like me, it’s watching Frozen.

I knew I wasn’t alone, so I put the question out to YOU on my Instagram Stories. Turns out, I was right. 

Here are your responses:

“Never thought I’d be so caught up in his sleep routine but here I am, crazy about sleep.”

“Lose my cool during a tantrum… who was I kidding.”

“Screen time to get through dinner at a restaurant.”

“Let my kid sleep with me.”

“Put licensed clothes on my kids.”

“Eating trashy.”

“Take them on a long haul flight at a very young age.”

“Co-sleep!”

“Suck the snot.”

“Yell. I swore I’d never yell. But sometimes I do and it makes me feel terrible.”

Things I Said I'd Never Do as a Parent

So, why am I sharing these responses? Because you are not alone. Chances are, you fit somewhere on this list as well. In fact, you may even be able to check off a few of the above list. I know I can.

And that’s ok.

Even if there was a point when you said it would NEVER EVER happen, things change. You do what works for YOU. The important thing is to understand why these choices work for YOU, rather than giving in to the guilt and the fear of judgement. 

It’s ok for things to change. It's ok to change your mind. Your kid is going to be fine if you let them hog the bed, wear a Princess dress out in public, eat marshmallows for dinner, and so on. They will be just fine.

And you know what? At the end of the day, you will be too.

So, morale of the story? Never say never.

Are there things you said you would NEVER do as a parent, but find yourself changing your mind? I’d love to hear!

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